Brave New World

It seems like everyday brings something new to us these days. Mini Me started summer school this week. The bus came by to pick him up on Monday morning (first time on a bus) and I thought I was going to lose it. I put him on the bus and quickly went back into the house. I felt a whole range of emotions I didn't know lived in me. I was excited, sad that he was leaving me, worried that he was scared about this whole new experience that I wasn't there to help him transition through. Turns out he was fine, I was the one who was the wreck about everything. He loves school and his new teachers, which I am grateful for. Now I just need to learn to navigate through the field of people who don't quite understand what it's like to have a sensational child.

These last two weeks marked the end of the school year for us and the beginning of summer vacation. This of course means trying to arrange time for Boy Wonder (Mini's older brother) plenty of time to see two of his best friends. Of course we have been overwhelmingly blessed by the boys that he has chosen as his best friends. I know their families well and they are great families. One of the moms is like my rock. She is strong, in control, and can handle 4 boys under the age of 8 like no mans business. The other (a teacher) is much more mild mannered. She and I have had quite a few conversations about Mini's destructive nature (as well as his diagnosis) and she, being so sweet and mild, simply said to me "oh he's so quiet and sweet, he can't be destructive". That is of course until he was, all over her backyard. Mini likes garden stuff- wire butterflies, glass lights, trinkets of that sort. So it came as no surprise to me that in the ten minutes he was in their backyard with Boy Wonder and his friend that Mini managed to do some damage to some wire butterflies. Of course I apologized profusely and offered to pay for any damage (btw, both boys are costing us a fortune in damaged property already). But still I found that both Boy Wonder and Mini Me were not allowed back over for a while. That was it. Play date hiatus. I didn't tell Boy Wonder that the reason he couldn't go over to his best friends house was because of his brother. That would have just given him more of a reason to despise Mini. Instead, I chose to sweep it under the rug and not mention it to Boy Wonder. But it leaves me to wonder, in a world of people that you think are understanding and sympathetic, are they really? Or are they understanding only until it inconveniences them?

Somedays I feel like I have diarrhea of the mouth. I am constantly explaining to people why I have to follow Mini around to make sure that he's not breaking things, starting a fight, jumping on the neighbors dog and trying to bite them (seriously happened yesterday) or running and screaming down the street. Everyday brings something new. I only pray that that I am up to whatever tomorrow has in store for me.

Shaved Ice and Epic Meltdowns

It's a beautiful summer like day here in Southern California. With school getting out next week I am already in full on summer mode. So I decided that for a special treat I would take Mini Me and Boy Wonder out for shaved ice (i.e. summer in a paper up cup). Both boys were very excited until we walked in the door. It was crowded. The floor was sticky. There were too many choices (no lie, this was an actual complaint). There wasn't any place to sit. Blah,blah, blah... So we waited in line. The boys finally decided what they wanted and then we waited longer to get our shaved ice. Mini Me was having a particularly tough time. He was wearing flip flops for the first time and they would not stay on his feet. The floor was sticky so his flip flops were sticking to the floor. He was frustrated. Finally a table opened up and we sat down. Guess what? Yeah the table was sticky too, super. We get our shaved ice and Mini hates that it's too cold. So he begins to ask for a pretzel. No Mini, I bought you a shaved ice, that's what they have here at oahu's shaved ice. Not happy, but not melting down. Yet. Then he accidentally kicks Boy Wonder under the table and Boy Wonder immediately screams at him. Mini screams back and covers his ears. They are now shouting at each other in the middle of a crowded eatery. People around us turn around and stare at the screamfest thats going down. Mini freaks out and runs for the door screaming. Now I have to pause this story to tell you about the location. It is in a strip mall on the corner of two busy roads. Given Mini's proclivities to run into the street I basically have one choice- leave Boy Wonder, my purse, the shaved ice and run like i am on fire. Fortunately I get to the door before he does. I scoop up all 50 pounds of him and take him back to the table, get all of our stuff, and take the boys outside. Mini clings to me, making his upset sounds as we sit. Boy Wonder realizes the gravity of what went down and he truly feels remorse (either that or he knows he wont get his good brother sticker of the day). The shaved ice is nearly melted and I am tired of the prying eyes that just witnessed the meltdown. We get in the car and leave. I take a deep breath and think about my next shaved ice- one that is heavy on the Cabernet and light on the ice...

Smart people say the dumbest things

We've all been there. The college roommate who pulled A's in Organic Chemistry and yet asked the dumbest questions about the world around her. Or the guy at work who was brilliant with numbers and could build a database in his sleep, but when it came to those around him, he had zero social skills and always seemed to say the most inappropriate things and the wrong time. Today I encountered our very intelligent, yet very dumb speech therapist, we will call her Ms. K.

Ms. K works with speech delayed preschoolers for the entire school district. All kinds of kids on the Autism spectrum come to see her, kids with SPD, and of course those that are just speech delayed. So the words that came out of her mouth today kind of took me off guard.

So there I was, waiting in the lobby for Mini to come out of his speech session. Normally we play a game where I pretend not to see him come through the door and then he surprises me at the last minute. Well today was different. Ms. K wanted to talk to me and was trying to get my attention, so I looked up. BIG MISTAKE. Mini threw himself to the floor, crying and screaming in the lobby of the school. I ran over to pick him up to move him out of the walkway so he wouldn't get stepped on. Then Ms. K asked the question I never thought that I would hear from a children's specialist: "what's wrong with him?" Um, huh? Really? You know his condition, you have his IEP, and you know that he's prone to meltdowns. She went on to tell me about Mini's progress and where he's hitting his goals, but honestly I didn't hear what she was telling me. All I could think about was how this intelligent woman could be so dumb.